Dónde está el Queso?

Apparently queso doesn't exist in Los Angeles. We've sampled a good number of local Mexican restaurants in the few months we've been here, and queso is not to be found. On one of our first Mexican dining excursions in LA, we ventured to a popular restaurant in Southeast Hollywood called El Cholo. After some very fine margaritas, Janet asked the waiter for queso, and he looked utterly confused, as if she'd just asked for a ladder or a rollerskate. When she repeated the request, he replied, "Like queso flameado? Melted cheese?" Until that moment, I had never realized queso — chile con queso — is a Tex-Mex phenomenon.

Janet & I had pretty much given up on our quest for "melted cheese" when Maggie invited us over one Sunday afternoon to drink micheladas and watch football. Her boyfriend invited some LA friends over, and Maggie whipped up an amazing Mexican-inspired feast, including chicken enchiladas, guacamole, and... you got it — queso! One Angeleno obligingly (if hesitantly) inquired what kind of cheese Maggie had served, as if she'd just set out a plate of gourmet fromage, while the others quietly avoided the steaming bowl of Velveeta & Ro-tel. We ate that shit like we'd never seen food. The queso was gone by the fourth quarter, but the only people who touched it were from Texas. Your loss, LA.